What I Would Write Home About

An Equestrian and Lifestyle Blog

Author: whatiwouldwritehomeabout (page 1 of 28)

Let’s go back to basics


I was trying to think of a funny title for this post, maybe a ‘click bait’ title but quite honestly it’s not come to me yet.

*Disclaimer, I am no longer frustrated by this subject and you’re about to read an incredible brain dump. Don’t forget your cup of tea.

A group of people hang out for a reason, be that a passion of the same music, the love for the couple getting married, the need for the chips at the bar, all having met on Tinder and awkwardly hoping that the person they’re meeting does actually look the same as the photo… they all have a mutual understanding that they are just there to get whatever it is done.

They’re not looking to be best friends forever, or publicly be the ‘best’ at something, or even claim to be an expert about something. Who knows you might even be standing next to the future prime minister and all you can really think about is why Tinder by Pitbull feat. Kesha isn’t playing ’cause really why else did you say yes to this night out or who picked yet another pastel orange dress for the bridesmaids.

But bring horses into the mix and the dynamic changes. Suddenly life is a competition, life is all about seeing who knows the most about the non-speaking third party in the situation. Hay should be at this weight, your behaviour should be like this, your horse shouldn’t poo between the hours of 3 and 5, you should only smile if your horse changed transition at letter A, not just before, not just after.

Not being funny mate, but my horse doesn’t read, nor does he tell the time and he most certainly doesn’t care about his bikini body or show condition.

There is something strange about the equestrian world, owners/riders/grooms are all slumped into a world that started with love and is now full of loveless judgement. At what point did the whole experience miss the key ingredient? You fell in love with a horse, you bought that said horse and you love riding that said horse. How can what other people do with their horse effect you? You didn’t buy their horse, you bought your horse. That same horse that is standing in the field enjoying life, not giving two hoots about how somebody else’s haynet is 15mm away from the door when yesterday and in every other previous life, it was 16mm away from the door.

Let’s go back to basics. Let’s start at the very beginning if you will – Hello Julie Andrews. Or even more to the beginning, of time, with words from the Bible (’cause I can’t put it any better myself).

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. 

So from now on, let’s just love our horses, love what we are doing with them, love that they eat more hay tonight then they did last night and love that they do not, cannot and never will read the manual. So a pinch of salt is needed at all time. Let people do what they would like with their own horses. Judgy – judge, go home.

K, bye.




Eight things you don’t realise until your horse is on box rest

  1. Routine


Suddenly life isn’t on as much of a routine as it was, your horse is there kicking up the neat bed whilst you’re trying to muck out and he’s still pooing whilst you’re on the yard… I mean, come on! Oh, how you miss grass turnout already! You’re not sweating by 9am, and you haven’t got horse slobber on your jacket sleeve. What is this?!


  1. Weight management programme


That extra box of biscuits and over-filled hay net just won’t cut it anymore, you’ve got to be strict all of a sudden, not only for your body but also your horse’s. Why doesn’t standing still (for him) and mucking out (for you) use as many calories as actual riding?


  1. Fun


You both adapt and get a different sense of humour – his, to try and get out of the stable and nudge you until you give him treats due to the overloaded horse-owner-guilt you have over the whole thing and you, are able to see the funny side of it all and take pride in grooming efficiently and giving that all important back scratch.


  1. As long as it takes


No corners can be cut, neither the swelling or lameness got the memo about hurrying up because it’s Summer-time or that the grass is looking particularly scrummy. So, it’s all-hands-on-deck to get the health back on track, with haste. The vet has visited again (hello £487,000 bill per call out fee), the salt lick has been replaced (finally) and he has a rather luxurious deep bed all of a sudden. Imagine Egyptian Cotton…


  1. Novelty


Fun, we can bond over grooming, overstretching for treats and hanging out. Yay. But we are now 3 weeks in, neither of us is looking our best, one rather rounder, one looking at the other because they really are costing them more than the fun either are getting… The novelty has gone – see ya enjoyment. Let’s not mention the vet bills.


  1. Dirty Tack


Mucking out now takes a third of the time it would normally, practice makes perfect as they say, and the boredom has kicked in – so you head to the tack room, a bit of a spring clean maybe. Oh gosh, that tack, no wonder he’s gone lame, probably in protest to the idea of being dressed with his own grease from 10 years ago… It’s scrubbing time.


  1. HOW MUCH?!


Mate, how can you produce that much excretion in 24 hours. You are a machine. I’m proud to call you mine.




We’ve done 3 weeks. We now don’t even look at each other. He’s up for sale. You’ve decided to take up tennis as a hobby. Then one random Wednesday, you head to the yard and…


Is he lame? No. Is there any swelling? No. LET US OUT… The time has gone, the years have gone by and now we can both get out into the real world.


I’m asking you one thing, just wait for another year before we have to go through this again…




**Horse bolts across field farting and bucking, human squirms away**


Photo by Kelly Forrister on Unsplash

Don’t Risk Your Happiness.

Just remember…




Product Review: Musto Base Layer

Working with horses requires layers, but also layers that you can remove when you’ve finished mucking out 30 horses! The amount of times I get dressed and undressed on a job is crazy, useful layers are all I wish for and buy these days!

Musto, in partnership with Zara Phillips, created a rather useful Musto Base Layer with cool colours too… orange, black and blue to be precise. A similar one is here.

Layered up with a jumper over the top, a gilet and my Henri-Lloyd. Not only does the base layer keeps you warm, it somehow manages to reduce the amount of sweat around your body, and keeps you light and therefore motivated!

If you are going to do anything this winter, get yourself a base layer, and some other warm layers. Keep yourself light and you will stay on top of your game!

What’s your key to layering? 


Three Top Hoof Care Tips


Happy Monday everybody – hope you’re all well and enjoying the March weather… better than February eh!?

As the age old saying goes, there’s no horse without the hoof.

They are one of the key areas of the horse, but, weirdly, can be the most forgotten, or most missed off the list of ‘horse care’. Lameness, laminitis, tendon issues, depression, absesses – all come from the hoof… it would appear that it is a rather key element of the horse!!

Getting started…

#1 – Hoof Pick

Before I do anything with Oscar – be that muck out or turn out – I pick out his hooves. It releases any pressure that is in the hoof, keeps the frog clean and if you are looking at the area everyday, you can notice a change before it becomes a massive problem – or fatal.

Hang a hoof pick on a bit of string and hang it outside the stable – that way you won’t have to find it before you get love your pony!!

#2 – Moisturise

Get yourself some effol/hoof mosturiser, and cover the inside and outside of the hoof every day – you can do it whenever suits. Hoof moisturiser works in the same way as hand cream on horse owner’s hands, it helps the hoof wall not to dry out and crack; therefore reducing farrier costs too! Look after the pennies and the pounds will look after themselves”

#3 – Timely Farrier Visits

Make sure that your horse is shod, or trimmed according to the time of year, and what your horse is doing.

If you are hacking on roads mostly – you will need to have more regular visits than if you are using the arena more often. Horses are routine animals, as we know, and they work with us – when we work with them!


What’s your ‘go to’ with your horse’s hooves? 

Northern Equestrian Services provide coaching, schooling and grooming, in the Cumbria, Lancashire, North Yorkshire area. Call 07837 187198 for more info or head to our website.




Older posts